Handlebar Moustache Survey by Terry Zwarich of Canada
Thanks to Terry
1. How long have you had a handlebar moustache, and what is your history with moustaches?
I have been rocking this Moustache for about 6 months. Prior to this Moustache, there were two others. My first Moustache was the over-groomed remnants of a beard. People started calling me Hitler, so I shaved it off. The second Moustache fell to the razor because I kept having “bad Mustache days”.
2. What moved you to grow a handlebar moustache?
Being a soldier, this is the only facial hair that I am allowed to have so I decided to give it a try. After some ridicule from certain higher ranking service men, I decided to go all out. In a way, this is sort of a silent rebellion.
3. What are some of the reactions of others as you grew your handlebar moustache? What sort of reactions or comments did you get initially from your significant other?
In the beginning, I received mostly negative comments but as time went on, they turned positive, almost to the point of adulation. I catch people staring at me. People go out of their way to talk to me. Women take pictures of me and people ask if they can touch it. My girlfriend is just thankful I don’t have a beard.
4. What are some of the funny or strange comments others have made about your handlebar moustache over time?
-Is that real?
-Is it Movember already?
My three year old girl says, my lips are dangerous
5. Has having a handlebar moustache had any effects on your personality/behavior, attitude, self-expression, sense of self?
Absolutely. I have always been outgoing and confident but now I am simply ridiculus. This Moustache is a catalyst for eccentric and powerful behavior. I am empowered to do/say whatever I want, which is okay because I am, for the most part, fundamentally respectful/considerate.
6. What is it in your personality that drew you to growing a handlebar moustache?
My Moustache is an outward reflection of my personality. Being that there aren’t too many people wearing Mustaches, it makes me kind of different.
7. Have you been in any moustache contests or attended any such gatherings?
Our Junior Ranks mess hosted a Movember party but other than that, not really.
8. It takes courage to wear a handlebar moustache. What would you say to those who think you look odd, silly or stupid with it?
I would probably stare at them in silence until they either left or somebody else started talking.
9. What waxes, styling aids or glues to you prefer and why?
I use a hair straightener to hammer out the curls and then apply two coats of white liquid Elmers Glue. The first coat is to set the shape in place and the second coat is to seal it in. If there is a chance of Moustache moisture damage, I will follow with a coat of vasaline (only when dry).
10. What do you think a handlebar moustache does for a man?
The handlebar Moustache demands respect and adoration. A man who wears one is empowered with pure unadulterated confidence.
11. How attached are you to your handlebar moustache and what would it take for you to cut it off or remove the curls and not grow it back?
I enjoy my Moustache very much and can see myself wearing one throughout my entire life. I can see myself temporarily shaving it off a couple times but to be told never to grow it back is simply unacceptable. I would choose getting punched in the balls by a 6 year old over shaving my Moustache
12. Have you accumulated any moustached merchandise, shirts, mugs or other stuff? Include web site addresses if you have them so others can take a look.
No, I don’t have any cool Moustache stuff but I do want to get some Moustache shirts.
13. Can you recommend some moustache web sites if you know any worth mentioning?
Sorry, don’t know any.
14. Have you participated in online events like Moustache May, Movember or others, and what was that like?
Not really but I did try to do my own thing. DecemberStache, Januhairy, Februhairy, MarchStache, and MayStache were some of the events I proclaimed to be part of. As opposed to explaining myself every time someone questioned the existence of my Moustache, I would simply say one of these event names.
15. What would you like to see on handlebarmoustachelife.com?
How about people with awesome Moustaches doing awesome things, like chopping wood or dressing deer.
17. How has having a handlebar moustache affected your love life, and does it interfere with the act of kissing?
I have been with the same girl for quite a while so my love life is established but basically, no Moustache rides and my kissing is unimpeded.
18. Does your handlebar moustache give you any superpowers?
Yes, I now have the ability to identify shallow, bitchy and boring girls. This would be a great super power if I were single
19. Would you share your location?
20. Please suggest a question you would like to see in this survey, and add your answer to it as well
Do you let people touch the Stache – yes, provided that I feel they are hygienically mindful.
Bonus Question by Josh: “Have you ever styled your mustache in a comical manner or specifically for a Halloween costume?”
Not yet but I think I might dress it up sometime with beads or something.
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